Scarlet's First Halloween

For Halloween this year, we went down to good old Elk Ridge for some fun times and what else? Good food of course. My parent's next door neighbor gives out beanie babies, so I had to get one for Scarlet this year as this is the last year they will give them out. Since it was too rainy and cold, Nate (Phantom), went down to their house for me and picked out a cute little bear for Scarlet. We were lucky enough to take Amber and Kyla with us this year too. They definitely made it a great time! They were the cutest treasure trolls I have ever seen! I totally forgot to take a picture of them though. :( Sadness.

Annual Friend Halloween Party

Halloween 2010 was FULL of excitement for us! Friday, we were lucky enough to attend the annual friend party. It's always hilarious to see what everybody will come up with for their costumes. Of course, this year did not disappoint. There was lots of delicious food and fun times to be had! Thanks Seth and Abby for hosting such a fun tradition! Me and Ry. (Wondering what Ryan is? He's a droog from A Clockwork Orange). The guys. The girls.

Dear Scarlet -- Blessing Day

Dear Scarlet,

Today was your special day! This morning, you were extra happy and pleasant. You didn't cry once. You slept until I needed to get you ready, and then I took my time getting on your beautiful dress (my blessing dress), your homemade bracelet, your blessing ring and of course, your specially made shoes. You looked fabulous! I kept looking at you and thinking of how lucky I am to be your mother. The day was even perfect. This morning was bright and sunny. Last night it was dark and rainy. Then all of a sudden there was a beam of light through the clouds and the most beautiful rainbow. I believe that was your brother telling us he's right here with us.

This week had been especially emotional for me. When I was first pregnant, I would think about this day and how special it was going to be to bless you and Kingston at the same time. As today approached, I realized that dream would not be. It was only you we would get to bless today. I cried a lot. I told your dad how grateful I am to have you, yet how broken my heart is at the same time. That heart break seemed to vanish as I felt the spirit close to us today, so peaceful and comforting.

You didn't make a peep the entire time at church. Your dad held you tight as he blessed you. It was amazing to watch as he carried you to the front of the congregation in his arms and then all of the priesthood holders surrounded you and placed their hands on you. There are so many people who love you! The spirit was overwhelming. I believe Kingston was there too. I think that is why you were so calm today. Even your dad was lucky enough to feel him there. How lucky are we to have Kingston?

After church, we had a delicious lunch and great company. We had lots of cousins and friends there to celebrate you! We ates lots of yummy soups and desserts. It was the perfect day! Everybody had to pass you around and stare at you. You really did look beautiful.

Scarlet, I know you won't remember today, but it will be forever ingrained in my memory as one of the most special days of your life. The gospel is amazing. I hope that one day you gain a testimony of the gospel for yourself and share it with those around you. I could not have made it very far this year without the help of our Heavenly Father. He truly does love us. Remember, you can do anything with two people as long as one of them is God. He will lead you through your trials and be there at your happiest moments. He is the Almighty.

Love you forever,

Mom

Scarlet's Photos

I think I'm in love with my child. She's so adorable in these photos. To see more, go here. My friend Tami did Scarlet's photos yesterday. Thank you Tami!!I had to have some done in a tutu because, well, tutus are cute. I also had her do some photos in the blessing dress, my blessing dress. I'm so excited Scarlet gets to wear the same dress I wore on my special blessing day. These shoes were custom made just for my tiny Scarlet. My friend, Carrie, is absolutely amazing at sewing and quilting. You should go see her at the Quilted Bear in Provo. You can even pick up a pair of these shoes for your little one!

73 minutes... 73 days

I know that I have mentioned this to some of you before, but I am going to say it again. There was a day just a few weeks after our twins were born when Ryan and I had to go to the health department and get their birth certificates for our insurance. We also had to get Kingston's death certificate. Up until that point, I had been oddly okay with the way things were. I walked out of the health department with documents in hand and then I started reading. I held my son's death certificate and read ... Kingston Ryan Hone born August 11, 2010. Time of birth: 9:02 a.m. Time of death: 10:15 a.m. 73 minutes. At that moment, it was like a slap in the face. Yes, this is real. He's gone. That's when my eyes became so blurry with tears I could no longer read the paper I was holding. I wanted to fall to the sidewalk below me and sob. I knew he was gone, but seeing it on paper was hard. I didn't realize he had only been alive for 73 minutes. When he was here with us, it was almost as if time slowed down for just a moment. I remember it so well.

9:02 a.m.: "Ashley, take a look at your son." I did. I was scared. He was tiny.

9:04 a.m.: "Here's your daughter. You can see she is much bigger than her brother." She was.

Somewhere around 9:45 I was wheeled back into my room. I got to hold Kingston for the first time. Then Ryan held Kingston in his arms and gave him a blessing. It was beautiful. Ryan has a way with words.

They gave Kingston back to me and I could tell his breathing was slowing. I had to ask the nurse to come check him and see if he was still alive. Yes, he still had a heart beat, slow, but a heart beat no less. I remember the hurt. My heart was broken. I could do nothing to comfort Ryan. All we could do was hold our child and watch him pass away. Again, I asked the nurse to see if he was still alive. She listened and walked away. She went to get the neonatologist. He came in, put his little tiny stethoscope on Kingston's chest and with sadness in his eyes, he told us Kingston was gone. I lost it.

Now here we are, 73 days later. I cannot believe it has already been 73 days. Scarlet is thriving. She is a constant reminder to us that she is a gift from God. A gift we are so grateful for. She is also a reminder of the 73 minutes we got to spend with her brother... a gift from God. So, for those of you who are parents out there, hold your child just a little tighter today. Hold onto those precious minutes they are in your arms and thank God he has given you a wonderful gift.

A Dad and His Daughter

Is this not the cutest picture ever? We had Ryan's sister, Stephanie, do some family photos the other day and she captured this precious moment. I love, love, love it. Ryan is always so cute with Scarlet. He is such an amazing father to her.

Crazy week....

(Kristen, Sara, Tina, Saundra, Tess, Brittany, Ashley, Me)

This week has been SO busy for us. Monday, I had Halloween bunco! It was so much fun. I love getting together with these girls and laughing hysterically. We always have so much fun together. We all dressed up for Halloween, obviously. Love you girls!

Then, we FINALLY got to get rid of the dang oxygen tank that has been living in the hallway for the last month and a half. I can't say I miss that thing. Good-bye Mr. Oxygen.

Today has been full of fun. Scarlet got to get all dressed up in her Halloween costume for the annual Dunn Halloween party. We ended up getting her costume at Build-A-Bear. Fits like a charm. It was so fun for all the Dunn's to finally meet little Scarlet.

After the Halloween party, we went to Fork Fest. I have to say this is probably the coolest thing by far, that has come out of American Fork. It was an all day music festival and so much fun!! My brother, Josh, was playing in 3 of the bands so we decided to take Scarlet to see her uncle get his rock on. She loved it. I was worried about it being too loud for the baby so I grabbed her beany and took her socks off and ended up with this beauty. We were laughing so hard at her. At least I felt a little better knowing that her ears were protected from all the music. And this was just too cute. Scarlet and her Uncle Josh. He just loves her to death.

Cousin Isalena

(Tina, Scarlet, Me, Isalena)

Baby Isalena is 2 weeks older than Scarlet. I was laughing so hard at the size difference. I wonder when Scarlet will catch up.... Hmm.. Isalena looked so beautiful for her blessing. I can't wait for these two to be best friends.

Dear Scarlet -- 2 months

Dear Scarlet,

You never cease to amaze me. You have a way of stopping the world. People look at you and are in complete amazing that you are the way you are, so tiny, so beautiful, so healthy. You always make those who look at you smile. I hope you are always that way. You truly are amazing!

Do you miss him? Kingston? I miss him for you every single day. I wonder how you continue to thrive so well without him here. I thought you would struggle a little more than you did, but you are a fighter. I like to think at night, when it is most quiet, that that is when you talk to him. I hear you in your bed while you sleep and I swear I can hear you laugh and talk. It's probably just you grunting while trying to poop, but I like to think you are talking to our precious angel.

In the last month, you have rolled from your back to your tummy twice. In the same day. You haven't done it again, but I know you will one day. I'm in no rush for you to grow up. I love being your mom. Everyday is the best day of my life with you here. I have waited so long for you to be in my arms and it is more glorious than I ever could have imagined.

You now weigh 6 pounds 6 ounces! Way to go baby girl! You still wear preemie clothes at night, otherwise you drown in your jammies and I'm always worried they will swallow you up and I will never see you again. You have started sleeping 4 hour stretches at night and I am so grateful for that! Maybe a 5 hour stretch here and there won't be so bad, huh?

Tubby time is still your favorite part of the day. You get so relaxed and comfortable. There was only one instance when I pulled you out and wrapped you in the towel that you pooped all over the towel, down the front of me and all over the bathroom floor. It was probably your biggest poop to date. I'm pretty sure you just didn't want to get out of the bathtub and that was your way of getting back in. It worked. It was gross. Grandma Dunn was here to witness it and we still laugh about it.

I think your eyes will be blue like mine, not blue like daddy's. We'll see. Either way, you will have beautiful blue eyes.

You have you daddy wrapped around your finger like you can't believe. He is so in love with you. So in love! He always thinks you have the cutest outfit on (he thinks that everyday, so apparently he just thinks you are pretty cute).

Scarlet, I love you. Thank you for being mine. Happy 2 month birthday!

Loves,

Mom

p.s. If you happen to see Kingston, tell him "hi" for me and that I really miss him and love him.

Scarlet and her friends

On October 5, one of my really good friends, Molly, had a baby girl. Her due date was about 2 weeks after mine and it has been so fun to be pregnant at the same time. I am thrilled for Scarlet to have Ahnika as her BFF while we are here in Utah. Molly, congratulations! She is SO beautiful! Yep, Ahnika is already bigger than Scarlet.

One of Scarlet's other best friends is my niece Chloe. Chloe LOVES Scarlet. Loves as in, cannot get enough of Scarlet. Chloe would hold Scarlet all day if we let her. It's the cutest thing ever! Chloe doesn't like to smile, but I finally got her to.... she just had to check with dad to make sure it was okay. :) Love that girl! (and yes, that is a BYU beanie but I'm about ready to trash it since BYU is stinking this year!! Come on Cougs!)

Today was Scarlet's 2 month check-up at the doctor's office. They see us every week there in the office. We are starting to know the entire office staff. Haha. Her weight is 6 pounds 6 ounces and she is 19 inches long. They couldn't even give me the percentiles because she is off the charts! Apparently most 2-month-old babies don't weigh 6 pounds 6 ounces. She's just a tiny little squirt and we love her to pieces (check out the outie belly button).

She had to get her immunizations today and it was heartbreaking. I made Ryan go with me for emotional support. I felt so bad for Scarlet that I ended up getting 2 shots myself (flu and pertussis).

Georgetown, Here We Come!!

As I mentioned in a few posts back, Ryan had been applying to masters programs at Georgetown and Kaiser for their nurse anesthetist program. Well, yesterday he received an invitation for an interview at Georgetown! I'm so proud of him and how hard he has worked for this. We are thrilled that we get to take a little vacation out to Washington DC next month so he can have his interview. I'm not sure what I'll do while he's at his interview, but I'm sure I won't get bored (how can you get bored in DC?). Anyway, way to go Ryan!